Kort indlæggelse

Jeg blev indlagt d. 18.07.20-22.07.20. Jeg var selvmordstruet og mine tanker kørte på højtryk, om hvordan jeg bedst og hurtigst muligt kunne tage livet af mig selv. Det psykiatriske akuttilbud mente ikke det var noget de kunne håndtere, at mine selvmordstanker var så presserende og at jeg derfor skulle ringe til lægevagten. Jeg kom til lægevagten og fortalte hvordan jeg havde det og at jeg var begyndt dagen forinden at skærer i mig selv igen. Han havde ikke noget valg end at indlægge mig, fordi jeg havde lagt planer for hvordan det skulle gøres – selvmordet.

Jeg blev indlagt på 3. etage og var der under et døgn og så kom jeg over på afdelingen, hvor jeg har været en del gange efterhånden og hvor de kender mig. Det hjælper altid at komme derover, for jeg er tryg ved personalet og de fleste er til at snakke med.

Jeg fik en af mine vanlige kontaktpersoner, så snart hun kom på arbejde og det gjorde mig så glad, for hun er så nem at snakke med og hun tager ligesom og bliver en slags mor for mig. Fortæller mig hvad jeg ikke må og så videre. Og det er oftest hvad jeg har brug for, når jeg kommer ind -en der tager sig af mig på en kærlig måde.

Jeg kunne ikke holde de selvskadende tanker langt nok væk, så jeg endte med at smadre en tallerken og skære i mig selv, selvfølgelig på en andens vagt end “mor”. Jeg endte med at fortælle det til vagten og hun tog det overraskende pænt. Det var jo kun mig selv jeg skadet.

Jeg blev som vanligt udskrevet, selvom jeg ikke følte mig klar til det. Men det ved de godt at jeg aldrig gør. Og at en lang indlæggelse ikke gavner mig.

22 meninger om “Kort indlæggelse”

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