Fastelavn

Jeg har mine drenge i dag, på denne fastelavns mandag. Den mindste har været klædt ud, som Batman og den store mener han er blevet for stor. Og driller derfor også sin lillebror med diverse. Men tror han alligevel synes det er lidt snyd, når hans lillebror på 30 min kan tjene omkring 100kr. samt slik. Den mindste ønsker så ikke selv pengene, hvad der ligger til grund for dette er jeg ikke helt klar over, men er bange for, at det er fordi han godt ved at hans mor ikke rigtig har nogle penge. Hvem ved? De opfatter meget mere end man skulle tro.

Han har snart fødselsdag, så hvis han stadig mener jeg skal have pengene køber jeg det dyrere en gave til ham, så får han jo pengene tilbage uden egentlig at vide det.

Jeg overvejer rigtig meget, at tage imod tilbuddet om at komme i en kreativ grp., der er på Mors. Mest af alt, for at lærer nogle flere mennesker at kende, men også for at udfordre min sociale angst. Det er jo den eneste måde jeg vokser af. Men nu må vi se om jeg har modet, når tid er. Jeg håber det i hvert fald, for det vil være godt til mig, at komme ud bare engang imellem. Ud fra den mur jeg har bygget op omkring mig i min lejelighed, hvor jeg faktisk ikke rigtig kommer ud andet end, når jeg har mine børn og jeg skal til møder og på daghospitalet. Jeg ville have rigtig godt af en hund. En hund, som jeg må tage med mig rundt omkring, så jeg kan komme mere ud, men stadig have en form for tryghed. Gad vide, om dette er en mulighed?

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